💬 Difficult Conversation Script

[Name], thank you for making time. I want to talk with you about something important and I want to be direct.

[State the issue. Clearly. Specifically.]

For example:
- I want to talk about the last three project deadlines, all of which were missed.
- A concern has been raised about how [situation] was handled. I want to understand what happened.
- Your output over the past [time period] has been below what we agreed, and I need to address that.

Do not build up to it with five minutes of small talk. The other person can feel it coming and it just makes things worse. Say it.

This matters because [explain the real impact on the team, the business, the client, or the person's own career].

For example:
- When deadlines are missed, the rest of the team absorbs the work at short notice. That creates pressure and it creates resentment.
- This is affecting how you are being perceived by senior leadership. I do not want that to damage your progression.

Be specific. Vague statements like it is not good enough are easy to dismiss. Concrete impact is harder to argue with.

Before I get into next steps, I want to hear from you.

[Stop talking. Give them space to respond.]

Good follow-up questions:
- Help me understand what has been happening from your side.
- Is there something I am not aware of that is contributing to this?
- What has been getting in the way?

Listen properly. Do not just wait for your turn to speak. You might learn something that changes your understanding of the situation.

Here is what I need to see going forward:

[Be specific. Vague expectations lead to vague outcomes.]

For example:
- I need deadlines to be met, or flagged to me at least 48 hours in advance if they cannot be.
- I need [specific behaviour] to stop.
- By [date], I expect [specific outcome].

Then ask: Is that clear? Is there anything you need from me to make that achievable?

I want to be clear: I am raising this because I want things to improve. I am on your side here.

I will follow up in writing today so we both have a record of what we discussed and what we agreed. We will check in again on [date].

Any questions before we close?

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Important: Always follow up a difficult conversation with a brief written record. An email is fine. Note what was discussed and what was agreed. This protects both parties and creates a paper trail if things escalate later.